If You're Writing A Story And A Voice In Your Head Says 'maybe This Is Too Much Fucked Up Mad Science,

Me

You ever think about how crows are acting not unlike how early humans probably did and you're just like. Oh ok

I'm afraid that I have the worldbuilder's disease and it is terminal.

my mental image anytime i see someone leave this comment

Me when I remember something I said ages ago that was wrong or my values no longer align with

Current map from a worldbuilding project I’m working on called Theia. I updated some of the borders and countries, so one of the continents will look drastically different, but places like Avalon are untouched. 

Your analog horror about the all consuming flesh and the sinister broadcast altering entities is not gay enough and i am not fucking joking

I hit my girlfriend today… wow I feel like crap. I guess I’m gonna get picked up by the cops tomorrow, so I figured I would tell you what happened. We were having an argument and she went too far. She made a comment along the lines of “your loser father couldn’t keep a relationship together, and neither can you!” When I was around 9, my parents got divorced and fought for custody. My dad wanted me and my brother because he genuinely loved us. My mom wanted us just to spite my dad. She won, and my dad kinda lost it over the years.

This was too far for me. I had never, EVER hit a girl before, but it happened so fast I didn’t even know I did it.

Basically, I cocked my fist back, and flew it straight into her nose. I thought it would be like the movies where she would get a little trickle of blood. It wasn’t. Her nose EXPLODED. I think I must of broken a bunch of cartilage or something because blood shot out of both her nostrils, got all over me, and all over the floor. She staggered backwards, hit her head hard enough on the wall to leave a dent, then slumped down.

We were both stunned for about 10 seconds before she started crying hysterically and ran into my room and locked the door. So I went to wash my hands, and while I was in the bathroom, I heard her run out of the house, and take off in her car. That was about 6 hours ago so I guess she didn’t go to the cops or anything. So later I went home, and broke down in tears… My mom came into my room and when she heard about the story she got scared and said you’re moving with you’re auntie and uncle in Bel-Air. I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and had a dice in the mirror. If anything I can say this cab is rare but I thought “Now forget it, Yo homes to Bel-Air!“

I think the obsession with having been “born this way” largely stems from the idea that you need to be “innocent” to be guiltless. 

If something is weird then you need to have no control over it, otherwise it would be mandatory to fix it. If I said that I had control over my stimming and could stop it at any time, people would request I do so. Not for my comfort but for theirs. If I said that I had control over my gender and could be something binary or maybe even cis, people would request I do so. If I said that I have control over my sexuality and could make myself heterosexual, people would request I do so. If I said I could control my attraction and could make myself monogamous, people would request I do so. If I said that I could control my disability and could choose to stop a flair up in its tracks, people would request I do so. They would never ask out of the goodness of their hearts, they would always be asking because I was annoying, concerning, distracting, or inconveniencing them. 

Diversity is sometimes only tolerated if you have no control. If you have control, rules will be made to stop it. Hair will be straightened, clothes will be standardized, languages will be shushed, interests will be squashed, weight will be lost, and so on and so on and so on. Proving that we were born this way replaces the more obvious, that we’re okay this way. I don’t need to be a helpless victim of my differences to be forgiven for them. My differences aren’t crimes. 

ftr I am forever going to be bitter that the post I wanted to be "let's talk about extinct ecosystems and how cool they are!" got derailed into yet another post just talking about a single taxon like the millions of other posts on palaeoblr