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Gevanni: You have any plans for tonight?
SPK coworker: Home, TV…
Gevanni: Well… Have fun
SPK coworker: You too *walks away*
Near: You’re gonna die alone
L: Look at me straight in the eyes and then tell me the truth, Light-kun
Light: You can’t expect me to look into your eyes and be straight
L:
L: This is an interrogation. Please do try to be a little more professional
Light: These handcuffs are making that a little hard
Light, *snapping at L*: I mean how petty can you get!?
L: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about
Light: ... Was it about local self-government, Article 92?
L, *blinking slowly*: Yes
Light: That was you!?!?
L: light is kira
Police force: Light isn’t kira
L: If I die light is kira
L dies
Police force: light isn’t kira
Near: light is kira
Police force: ok
L: Bye Light! Bye Matsuda! Bye Misa! Bye Light!
Matsuda: You said ‘bye Light’ twice.
L: I like Light.
L: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends.
Light: … Your what?
L: My friends.
Matsuda: Is he saying “friends”?
Misa: I think he's being sarcastic.
Aizawa: No, no, no, this is delirium, he's cracked from being awake all night. Hey, L! All of your friends are in this room.
L: I have other friends.
L: [calls Naomi] Naomi they're bullying me again.
Matsuda: [Trying to fill out legal paperwork stuff] Were you guys born AMAB or AFAB?
Light: Bold of you to assume I was born at all.
L: I personally was created in a lab.
Misa: I just straight up spawned lol.
Beyond: You seem familiar, have I threatened you before?
Beyond: you fuckers don’t know about my knife stick. it’s a knife taped to a stick and it’s the ultimate weapon.
Naomi, not looking up from her book: spear.
Beyond: BLOCKED.
Matsuda: let’s all agree that going up the stairs on all fours is actually the best experience on earth.
L, on thirty-five cups of coffee with eight sugar cubes in each cup: conversely, going down the stairs on all fours is actually the most terrifying experience on earth.
Light: Do you take constructive criticism?
Misa: Yeah
Light: You're fucking trash, misa
Misa:
Misa: *gasp* Oh no light don't talk about yourself like that, you're not trash! You're amazing! I love you!!!
Light: Do you take constructive criticism?
Misa: I only take cash or credit.
L: People are always asking me if I'm a morning person or a night person.
L: And I'm just like, 'I'm barely even a person.'
Light: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.
L, drinking toast: Why do you say that?
Misa: WHAT’S YOUR TYPE
Light: L
Misa, desperately, as Light bleeds out: YOUR BLOOD TYPE
Light: Oh! B positive.
Misa: DON'T TRY TO CHEER ME UP JUST TELL ME YOUR BLOOD TYPE
Light: