Im Being Dramatic - Blog Posts

A Dramatic Retelling

In my bedroom late last night, next to my phone's very lifeline, I discovered a mouse who lay half dead, adjacent to its perpetrator, my menace of a cat, Michigan. Its breaths were shallow, movement sparse, one of its legs crumpled helplessly beneath the poor creature. I carted it in a dust pan outside to lay it to a slow, painful rest on the forest floor, among its natural habitat. When I returned to my humble abode, I found Michigan staring at me soulessly, outraged that I had betrayed him in taking away his playmate. This afternoon, in virtually the same spot on my floor, next to my bed, I stumbled upon a gruesome scene. No blood, no viscera, just the top half of a mouse carcass, cleanly severed from its hindquarters with a near practiced precision. I, having locked him away with his food and litter for the day whilst out running errands with my dear mother, feared this to be a threat and still do as I pen this down. A search of the room has been conducted, and I can not locate this rodents rump. As a connoisseur of the feline mammal, I am to understand prey such as this is hunted for survival, and yet my own fur-coated son has never displayed such hunger for the living. I worry he has consumed part of this mouse, and, if not, an even more important concern would be pinpointing the bottom half, sealed off from sight, potentially staining the very carpet upon which I trot bare-footed. A concern of mine is that this once feral individual has returned to his primal status and may never again quench his thirst for violence.. for flesh... for a meal that may very soon be.. me.....

As mostly Ranpoe shipper: I don't see Ranpo and Yosano as siblings (i hate ppl saying this btw), i don't headcanon Yosano as lesbian, i love Souheki, i never wrote anywhere something like "but what about Ranpoe", i drew Ranposano fanart, i actually headcanon that Yosano is in love with Ranpo, and i sometimes see Ranpoe as just friendship (in some happy universes, there's Ranposano and Poecott solidarity OR Ranpoe and Kousano/Yosano x Mushitaro solidarity hehe)

Btw same with Saiouma or Saimatsu. In some happy universes there's Saimatsu and Irouma/Oumami solidarity OR Saiouma and Irumatsu/Amamatsu solidarity, hehehe

losing my months long hyperfixation hurts so bad in the sense that it doesn't hurt at all; it just feels less, going from all consuming obsession to mild indifference

Listen, of the 1,025 Pokémon that exist I will always find a way to defend 1,024 of them

However, there is one, exactly one Pokémon that I hate with every fiber of my being. Remembering that it exists fills me with rage. Seeing it instills disgust. His very existence has caused me to avoid passing through certain routes if I can help it, just so I don't have to see it. I don't hate much, but I despise this stupid Pokémon

I hate him to his very core

I hate how humanoid he is. I hate how his horns look like hair. I hate that he wears shoes, as ugly as they are. I hate the stupid pink dots on his fingers. I hate that his name gives him a title, Mr. Mime. I hate his Detective Pikachu appearance that must have been created by a monster wishing to give children nightmares. I hate his shiny that stands as the singular proof that lime green is too widely used, controllable or not. I hate his Galarian form that somehow makes him even more off putting, I hate that he was given one instead of a better Pokémon. Most of all, I hate that he comes from something so cute

Do you want to know the only time I have released a Pokémon, dear reader? It was when I had caught Mime Jr. at 8 years old, so excited that it would evolve into something pretty or cool. I would add it to my team, and it would battle alongside me to victory. Alas, level 19 came, and to my younger self's utter horror I watched as my adorable clown became a creature that never should have been created. How could Arceus allow such a creature to exist in its creation, to thrive while crushing the hopes of children? This child who knew not how the game properly worked immediately released the abomination, leaving behind a Pokémon she once held hope in but now couldn't recognize

11 years have passed since I taught that Mime what trauma is, and to this day I despise what my child became

A friend: I'm allergic to chocolate

Me: