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Discovering My Personal Style
Needless to say, it hasnât been easy. Lucky for me, I was fortunate not to be influenced by outside forces: aka, the modern world in the form of public school. Because they would have attached stereotypes to me at best and bullied me at worst.
Before puberty, I didnât really care about my style, because at that point I didnât even know who I was. I didnât have a firm grasp on what my likes, dislikes, personal goals and dreams were, and that was fine - it was normal. I was still learning about new things every day.
When puberty did hit and I suddenly started to care, things got confusing fast. For one thing, I went from being an elfin waif to a Germanic/Latina so full of curves the âteenâ clothing section was not an option for me. So I turned to thrift store oddities and boysâ clothes⌠and growing my hair out to Sailor Moon anime lengths. Looking back, I think I knew I wasnât going to be one of those people that strictly adhered to ever changing fashions, I wanted practicality and comfort, but all while still maintaining my femininity.
Those years, from my early teens to my early twenties, were hard on me, because I didnât know who I was and what I wanted, so I lacked confidence in myself. Mid twenties werenât all that helpful either. But between living abroad, working miserable jobs to save up for grad school and of course grad school itself, I didnât have a lot of time and brainpower to stop and really reflect on what kind of styles felt like me.
And that was the missing piece I wasnât getting for the longest time; what did I gravitate towards, what aesthetics brought me joy, what styles made me feel the most comfortable to be in my own skin?
Over the years, I think I picked up bits and pieces but didnât put them together until recently. As a teen I wore boysâ cargo pants all the time. In my early twenties I had lots of tailored blouses. In my mid twenties I finally mastered some makeup techniques. In the past few years Iâve been on a 1940s-1960s vintage kick.
The result is what I think of as âAudrey Hepburn meets Evelyn O'Connell in the 21st centuryâ (with a little Anazen originality thrown in).
So for those of you who are still trying to find your style, donât feel pressured to do so. I didnât know what mine was until I hit 30, and to be honest, it might change later! But right now, this is what I like and feel the most comfortable in. And for those that have found a style that doesnât fit a stereotype; ignore the boxes! Especially if like me, you were worried about how your unique style would cause others to form false opinions of you before they got to know you. Thatâs not your concern, itâs completely on them. True relationships arenât about what the other person is wearing.
We live in an age where it is ridiculously easy to experiment with an endless selection of styles and combinations, so itâd be a shame not to find a look that is perfect for you.