Spankoffski Bros - Blog Posts

Funny thought lol

Finished a piece for the TGWDLM Reprise fake Playbill Mini-Zine Collab that @riveracheron is putting together!

I saw that the Ad for Spankoffski's Heart and Sole was open and jumped on it!

I really wanted an excuse to draw college age Ted (including the early Starkid Era Joey Headband) and then I had the idea that the Spankoffski's would want their ad to include their kids. I feel like at the time, Ted would've used this as a bragging point, and Pete would be forever embarrassed. In my own headcannon, the grammar mistake of Women's Shoe originates from this Ad and is a running inside joke between the Spankoffski brothers, which is why he says it in the Beanie's scene in NPMD (in the Digital Ticket version.)

This was fun and I would totally do something silly like this again :)

Some of my Ted headcanons since I apparently got inspired by Joey's ones for him 🐐

Very hairy, mostly upper body tho

Polish heritage

Unlike Pete who does know Polish, Ted only knows basic phrases and words

He uses this to pick up women and thinks it's cool to know multiple languages (if you're from Europe, you know it's kinda not)

He does know it enough to communicate with Pete when the boy calls him and has to be discreet (Pete makes sure Ted understands him)

Has a goat hoof shaped birthmark that every single Spankoffski that has ever lived has. Both him and Pete have it on their right forearm

Was made fun of cause of the birthmark so he hates goats

Lives in a two bedroom apartment with Pete near his work

When he needs to drive Pete to school, he makes Pete pay him

The money doesn't stay with him tho, as he puts it in Pete's snack fund that he gives him every day before school

Ted pays for the snack fund himself

Plays Europop loudly when in his car, embarrassing Pete whenever they drive together

Music taste stuck in early 2000s, doesn't know modern artists at all (pretends to know when he needs to pick up women

Owns fedoras and Panama hats

Owns way too many summery button ups with hideous prints

Bisexual but leans towards women

Likes the color yellow, especially mustard yellow

Seen as the fuck up in his family, Pete is the only one who cares about him (Pete was a do-over baby for their parents)

Only one with his own office at CCRP cause he has no shame and annoys his coworkers constantly (can't be fired cause he's one of their lab rats, ofc)

Dog person

Gets Jenny flashbacks constantly and drinks to forget

His theme song is Lady Mustache by Tape Five

Joey's Ted headcanons

He apparently did the cameo in 2 seconds, so here, lol. Also, he does think I'm the official Ted artist in the fandom 😭 honor

Remember, these are just actor headcanons, nothing official 👍

Ted genuinely loves Pete

Hes' very romantic, but he puts on a facade of a bullshit guy cause he wants to seem cool

He does think Paul is his best friend

Ted's one of those guys who doesn't wear pants at home, he's just in boxers

He does wear a tie tho, in case he needs to go out or have a zoom meeting

He uses excessive amount of cologne

Ted constantly goes on dates. Most women in Hatchetfield have "gone on a date" with him, but they last 5 minutes cause how much of a terrible guy Ted is

Lot of people know him in town and think he's a creep

All his deaths need to be embarrassing

Always orders take-out, never cooks for himself

He takes Pete out constantly and tries to be cool in front of him, but Pete is embarrassed by him, but still thinks he's cool (side note is that Joey'd like a NMT episode of Bill and Alice hanging out and Ted and Pete hanging out)

Ted loves dogs and maybe has a dog at home we don't know about

some quick spankoffski bros memes bc i'm a sucker for age-gap siblings like wdym ur older brother was alive for the end of the cold war. ted what was it like living through the great depression.

also hc that pete wouldn't be caught dead using zoomer terms except in the very specific instance of making his brother feel Weary