I Hate Anyone Touching Me, But I’m Perfectly Fine Touching Certain People. I Think It’s Both Adhd

“Looking for someone more qualified”

How the fuck am  I not qualified enough for Walmart??!!?

Thinking about this conversation from Discord

It sucks for some big media thing to incidentally have an idea you also had, but never posted anywhere.

Because now if you do anything with it people will go "omg this is like [blank] ! I can see you were inspired by it !"

And I'll say "no actually" and they'll be like whatever, but in the back of their mind they'll think I'm lying.

I guess the positive thing is that the whole time I thought maybe it was stupid, but actually it seems like everyone liked it and thought it was cool. In a way you made something people clearly enjoyed.

Sometimes, I don't want to heal. Healing almost feels like a betrayal to myself. I know what they've done, and the damage will never be fully healed. It almost scares me to think that I might forget or become numb to it. As long as the wounds stay open, and I still feel the burning pain, it's real. I can't trick myself into thinking it's not.

There are other times when I don't want to heal because people might not believe me. I've already plenty who don't, but it would be so much worse if someone saw evidence of my trauma but didn't believe me because the rest of my personality and coping mechanisms seem normal. If I stay broken, the smaller cracks are less noticable, and they're easier to explain. Obviously, a shattered window is going to have both big and small cracks and might even be missing some pieces.

Sometimes healing just doesn't seem worth it because I feel like my life should be perfect once I'm past that point. People have it worse, and the worst is behind me, so I have no right to be this way.

I don't know. I'm not sure I want to heal

There is no better feeling in the world than coming home from a long day at working and starting off your weekend by pulling the one character you've wanted for so long in the gacha game you're currently obsessing over. Mona Megistus is my wife now. Don't touch her.

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how to disarm Boston Dynamics drone dog

the Chils sisters

People keep telling me my job is supposedly easy, but it's not to me. It's so hard every damn day. and I feel guilty because I'm making more money than plenty of people who have it way worse, but I've gotten so depressed. I don't feel like it's worth it most of the time. I'm off 2 days a week, the building has air conditioning, and we get an hour for lunch, which is more than most people, but I'm still so upset all the time. And being so guilty about it is even worse.