Christmas Time Is Here, So Do Y'all Peel You're Candy Canes Before You Eat Then?

Day 1 of my self quarantine

I don't want to get out bed but I also really want tea. Not much has changed

"God I just want to go home and eat some sexy oreos"

-One sexy trilobite

can we please adopt pirate aesthetics into mainstream fashion

i wanna dress like a pirate so bad

i want sexy noblemen shirts to be a thing for both men and women

i want to wear a nice ass frock coat everywhere i go

i want straps and buckles on everything

i want amazing leather boots to parade around in

i want nice big hats with feathers and swords and flintlock pistols to show off

i just want pirate aesthetics everywhere

I want to be free of this thing we call "responsibilities". Let me run barefoot, butt ass naked in the woods with a vodka stash so I may be free as the local cryptid I am meant to be.

Yes, drink the Bubby

"Sorry for spitting Kombucha on you"

- A friend

To those of you who wad up toilet paper,

you got some serious and unchecked problems.

Daddy satan, can you braid my body hair?

Hell

I walk down the stairwell, the only sounds being my own breathing and footsteps.

There are few lights for me to see but somehow I know where to step although I have never walked here before. The lights that are here exist as floating orbs in small slits of the smooth walls.

I feel a breeze just out of reach, enough for me to believe the end is around the next turn. My curiosity endless like the stairs I hurriedly walk down. Then with a single step I am there. And He is there, all I hear from silent lips is " there's cheese in the fridge."

God I love me that bagged fridge cheese.

Halloween must be hell for police. There are severed body parts everywhere and they keep getting more realistic.